Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Lost Von Trapp Sister

All this rain is making me have a MONSTER migraine. I love how it's making everything green and HATE what it's doing to my head. Needless to say I don't feel like a real post here. I promise to have one tomorrow with my thoughts on all things "Swine" related. Until then enjoy this video recommended to me by a coworker.

Does this make anyone else want to put on Leiderhosen and dance around like the lost Von Trapp child?
No? Umm.......Me neither.....cuz that would be crazy, right?

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Training Day

Getting ready to do a training walk. I need to break in my new shoes! I definitely don't want to get blisters like last year. I mean I had to throw away my socks!

It's still not too late to make a donation. I REALLY need the funds. Any amount is appreciated as I've committed to $1800 whether I raise it or pay it myself!

Monday, April 27, 2009

Hey..... This IS my Tan!

I am a white girl.

Scratch that, I'm the palest girl you will probably ever meet. Someone even signed that in my high school year book. I'm so white that my skin is almost transparent. You can see all my blood vessels.

I do not tan.

The sun is my natural enemy. Being such a white girl, I turn some shade of red or pink that fades right back to pale white. Yesterday, Spiderman had his first baseball game. I went to watch. I was wearing a long sleeved hoodie and shorts and it wasn't a particularly sunny day. In fact, it had rained a little that morning. I thought I was safe.

I was not.

My knees and ears are toast. I mean, they are lobster red. The skin feels tight and itchy and I know it's going to be gross once it peels.

Sometimes I wish that I could tan. When I was just out of high school it was really popular to go to the tanning beds. All my friends went until their skin looked leathery. I gave in to the peer pressure and gave it a try. I went to several sessions and OMG actually started to have some color! It was awesome.

Then one day, it all came to an end. I was always a nervous tanner. I have issues with laying still doing nothing for that long of time. Combine that with a slight fear of coffin-like machines and it's never pretty. This one day in particular I undressed and got into the tanning bed. I turned on the built in fans and put my little blue goggles on. I then prepared to wait out the 15 minutes of boredom that I knew was coming. As anyone who has been tanning knows, those lights are pretty hot and I started sweating. I could feel the sweat dripping off me and onto the bed. I heard a little sizzle as the sweat hit the hot lights. I also heard the hum of the machine and what I thought sounded like electrical current.
At this point I'm starting to get fidgety. I shifted around a little bit and then I felt it.......a sharp pain right in my ass! My first thought was "Oh my god I'm being electrocuted!"

I flung open the top of the bed, leaped out, and slammed it shut again. I stood in the tiny room buck naked completely freaking out that I had just been electrocuted.

That was not the case.

As I was frantically putting my clothes back on, out flew none other than a wasp. I have no idea how it got in there, but it had just stung me in the ass! I was so traumatized that I never went back. EVER.

I'm just going to embrace my whiteness.

And buy a lot of sunscreen!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

To My Husband:

Hope you have an awesome day even though you insist that you will never age past 29.





Ummmm.....yeah....that's all I've got today. I know.... I'm lame.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Guess Where I Went This Weekend?

Oh, yeah. That's right. I went to see Mary Poppins and it was AWESOME! For my birthday, my mother-in-law got tickets for my sisters-in-law and I to go. They were front row, center. Wonderful, glorious seats! The show was fabulous and I recommend it to anyone.
When I was a little girl, I was a Mary Poppins freak. (Ok, maybe I still am, I mean look at my blog title after all) I mean I was Mary Poppins when I was a kid.

Despite the gloomy, rainy day in Chicago we still managed to have a great time. We ate at a restaurant right next to the theatre. It had the prettiest view!
This was the view from our table. We sat right next to the window and bonus: got to see a car accident. Gotta love driving in the rain. The food was excellent and I even had flourless chocolate cake to fulfill my constant chocolate craving.
At the theatre, we answered some Poppin's trivia to win free soundtrack CD's. Finally we made it to our seats. The lights dimmed.....
And the guy sitting next to me proceeded to bounce his leg up and down so hard that it shook my whole seat. The entire first half he alternated bouncing his leg, checking the time on his cell phone, and giving a big sigh and shifting in his seat. I was like, Dude, if you don't want to see the show get up and leave! Don't ruin it for me!
It took everything in me not to punch him. I was actually surprised that I only calmly laid my hand on his knee. I told him to stop making my chair shake......or else I would kill him. Well, not the last part, but I did think it.
Overall, though, it was a wonderful time.
I'm glad I got to see it with my "girls".

Friday, April 17, 2009

Justifiable Homicide

Today I am tired.

Veeeeeery tired.

I have to get up for work every day at about 5:20-ish. Spiderman, however, gets to sleep in several more hours as he doesn't have to be at work until 8, we live 5 minutes from his job, and let's face it, he's a boy they don't need much time to get ready! Because of the difference in wake up times, I go to sleep several hours before he does. Also, I'm a big fan of sleep. I Love, Love, Love it, and am really cranky if I don't get enough. Last night I went to bed at my usual time and left Spiderman up with his friend. They were having some beer and playing Wii boxing. You know, boy stuff.

He got into bed and fell asleep around 1:30 am.

And how do I know this?

My husband has supersonic snoring. I mean, I'm surprised China didn't call to complain. Because of this I sleep every single night with ear plugs. (sometimes I even get little pressure sores in my ears from them) When he drinks, the snoring gets worse. Last night he woke me up out of a dead sleep with ear plugs several times.

I'm sorry, but in the wee hours of the morning when you have only a few more hours to sleep after being woken up several times, I am not a happy person. At that time of the morning he is no longer my husband, my partner, the love-of-my-life.

He is just the source of All. That. Noise.

And he must be eliminated.

When he sleeps he also becomes over a thousand pounds. And can't be moved. Or rolled on his side so that he can fortheloveofgod STOP SNORING!
In those crazy sleep deprived moments, I seriously contemplate suffocating him. It would be so easy...... I would probably regret it though. He does lift all things heavy....and take out the garbage. Tonight my sister is coming over for some homemade pizza and Twilight viewing. I only hope I can stay awake!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Electronic Sass

Since getting my Wii Fit, I've been trying to do a little every day. Mostly because I'm embarrassed by my pudgy little Mii. I want her to be svelte.
On Monday I did all of the yoga poses, some of the balance games and strength training, and the stair stepper and short run (for aerobics). I think it was pretty well balanced. I like to mix it up because I loathe exercise and get bored really easily. That's why I got the stupid thing to begin with...to try to trick myself into exercising.
On Tuesday, I went to the grocery store after work and did some light housework. No time for Wii.
On Wednesday, I came right home and turned it on. Did you know that the little shit had the nerve to get sassy?

What Sarah, too busy to exercise yesterday?

Look little Wii board, I don't really need grief from you. Can you just lay off already?
Yeah, I know I need to get fit.
I'm aware.
I don't need this pressure!

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

He will make a bed out of anything!

Monday, April 13, 2009

Little Pink Pills

I had some blood work done today to check on my hormone levels since Insemination: Round 2. After round one, my progesterone levels were low and I had to take supplements. Sounds easy right? They called in the prescription for me and told me to take them three times a day.
Sure, no problem.

Until I picked it up at the pharmacy.

Take vaginally three times a day.

What?!?!?!?

You want me to put that where!?!?!?

Three times a day!?!?!?!?!

But I was a trooper. It was gross, messy, and I was afraid that every time I coughed or sneezed I'd shoot one of the little puppies out and across the room. This time though, my progesterone levels were fine. Right on track. No supplements for me!

I cannot express how much that makes me happy. And everyone else around me, too.

And if you really want to make me happy, click here and donate to my Avon walk. I'm still far from my goal and every little bit helps!

Friday, April 10, 2009

Just a Quick Note...

I braved the wilds of the mall parking lot almost killing two rowdy teenagers who threw themselves in front of my car and then had the nerve to give me a dirty look...all to purchase the $25 Borders gift card for Robin, the winner of my Blogiversary contest.

The actual purchase of the card was not bad. Just the parking thing was. I love Borders. I worked there when I was in college and it was the best job I've ever had. If it payed what I get paid now, I'd still be there. Well, it would have to pay more than I pay now as a large percentage of it would go right back to the store. That's what happened in college. I would work extra shifts sometimes to offset my book-buying.

Anyway, I made it out alive (and didn't even purchase anything for myself!!) and will be sending the card your way Robin. I hope you get much enjoyment out of it. Let me know what you use it for. I'm always looking for new books!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Random Blog Search

Am I the only crazy person who checks their blog stats? I don't do it every day (although I used to when I first started this blog) I check it maybe once a week if I remember. There's a section for when people search for certain key words and your blog comes up.

Sometimes I'm amused by what brings people to my little corner of the interweb.

For example:

Dooce.com marshmallow peeps
What the heck are they looking for? Has she posted about them?

the best most awesomest cake in the world
True, my birthday cake was pretty damn awesome. With all that chocolate icing dripping down the sides.....Great, now I want cake.

god doesn't want me to be happy
So maybe that was a little bit dramatic....but I still haven't gotten those boots!


I wonder, do you think that the people searching for these were intending to get my blog? If not, I wonder if they think I'm crazy.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Julie & Julia



I am currently reading this book. Julie and Julia by Julie Powell. It's awesome. Julie is "pushing 30" (her words not mine) and a secretary who hates her job. She recently finds out that due to an undisclosed hormonal condition (I'm thinking PCOS) she probably won't be able to have children.

Are we seeing some parallels here? Hates her job....dealing with infertility.....is it any wonder I'm LOVING this book?

To combat these trials she steals a copy of her mother's Mastering the Art of French Cooking by Julia Child and vows to cook her way through this book in a year. She started a blog....way back in 2002....to tell of her progress. It's hugely entertaining. Especially the part when she has to go on the lam because of her guilt over the seafood section. She murders several lobsters and never quite gets over it. I would love to do this myself, but I'm such a picky eater, I doubt I'd make it past the Oeufs en Gelee. Which is basically poached eggs in this congealed jelly/jello stuff. It sounds very unappetizing.

It does make me want to experiment and cook more. So many days I just get lazy and let my husband (who loves to cook too) do all the cooking. Maybe I need to rediscover the joy I used to have in it. Maybe I need to have more dinner parties as cooking for only two can sometimes be a drag.

Anyone wanna be a guinea pig for some new recipes?

Monday, April 6, 2009

Mondays are Stupid

I'm home from work today all achy and bloaty from what I like to call Insemination: Round 2. Not a good day to purchase and try a Wii Fit in case you were wondering. Cuz I'm in the perfect mood to be told that I'm overweight and my fit age is 42. Awesome!

So to fit my mood, I thought I'd share with you a song that I've recently become obsessed with. It's my new anthem whenever I'm having a crap day.

Hope it makes you smile. Happy Monday!